SEPTEMBER

From the moment we arrive we are connected to the world, by virtue of our own existence. No questions asked at first then a tsunami of inquiries arise. How, when, where, who, what will life hold. How will you survive, thrive, stay alive, when and where will you go, with who and when? We do not know but the basics. Sometimes and most importantly, within our own evolutionary trajectory, the dots finally connect. It may take a lifetime; or in flashes at various times in one’s life, consciously, unconsciously, worldwide, right in front of our face or unbeknownst to us in ways that only our hearts and souls understand and acknowledge.

The initial physical connection takes place from the beginning, if all goes well as newbies, we are taken care of, loved, nurtured, raised with love and taught to connect with good people, things, places, interests, good beliefs in general. Connections require constant corrections and transform into lessons learned, can involve opportunities ceased or squandered, run their course perhaps simply not meant to be or a must connection in some measure or degree. 

We connect with spirits, people and animals, plant and other wildlife too, constantly, mentally, emotionally, physically and on vibrational levels. From the slightest passing seemingly inconsequential glance, an impassioned gaze of wonder and awe or to hold for a moment in time. A coincidental brush of a shoulder, intentional reassuring touch or heart-pounding jubilant embrace, at any given moment connections are made. 

Connections are slight, transparent, may only last as long as a dream or connect our entire life holding potent rippling negative and positive effects. Connections are casual, strong, important, irrelevant, interesting, inspiring, necessary, offensive, insulting or sought after and determined by fate, our own design, possibly karma and answered prayers. 

We connect and disconnect in way’s to teach us something, clearly or obscured, of a redemptive quality, a chance to renew or discontinue accordingly. Connections are defined by our own needs, wants and wishes to connect to those elements meant for us. 

Drive-up Window

It was a brief encounter, it left me feeling sad and hopeful God would bless the kid at the window who took my money and quiet prayers for her peace and comfort. I requested fries and a couple of green chile cheeseburgers. Please do not judge my lunch decision, this story is not about unhealthy food choices.

I drove up to the second window, happy about landing at the correct second window. The girls voice and eyes sounded like a teenager. She repeated my order, I signaled agreeably while feelings of guilt rushed in and out regarding ordering those filthy fries I hate to love. She didn't care what I ordered and waited patiently for me to hand her the money.

 As I organized the correct amount and went through the ashtray for the exact change, I asked her, how her day was going. She shook her head "Not good", behind her facemask I saw a smart, soulful, sad, brave, kind individual. I could not help but offer platitudes and blessings. "I am so sorry, hita". fighting back tears, glad she couldn't see me getting choked-up from behind my baby blue bandana facemask and sunglasses. I felt her suffering, but not to the depth I could see in her eyes, from having to put-up with disrespectful people. "You are doing great!". "People are very stressed-out these days. It still is not an excuse to be disrespectful, easier said than done, but try not to take the ill-mannered, rude behavior of others, personally". "Sometimes people confuse kindness for weakness and think it is OK to trample on nice people". "It is not OK, do not acquire a taste for it". She looks at me with what I perceive as, gratitude. As I drive forward, friendly whispers from Heaven say; "God Bless you, hita, stay beautiful".

I cannot adequately describe the bitter sweetness of the moment. With all my heart I lift her up and anyone needing blessings, respect, respite, peace and comfort. Yes, God Bless her, her work and presence at the drive-up window. It was a powerful prayerful exchange, rapid fire, full of goodness, God's Grace, a spiritual thing.

Thoroughfare

It's been a while. I have missed you like a mother misses her child. I think about you often and hope you know how much I appreciate you in my life. We keep in touch by quick flashes of expression in other social media platforms, but I know it is not enough when you are here with open arms and an open heart on the ready to write it out. Thank you. I feel an indebtedness to the powerful resources you offer me as I look the other way. I pray, a sincere thoroughfare is being created at this very moment with these very words jumping on the surface of the screen onto this boxed set of thought and expression. I have missed your pliability and all the possibilities. I carry you around like an unopened big box of crayons waiting to be opened and used in the best way possible.

We exchange and share ideas with words and take them personally as if we own each letter that forms each thought and expression. Places words take us and bring us back to, with each personal custom made to order and fit our needs in a moments notice or without notice, like when one speaks before thinking which can cause problems, when you realize you should not have said something, after you say it.

Sincerest apologies for not connecting with you on a regular basis. It has been too long since we have sat together and complimented each other as nicely as we could. Moving forward and away from recent lack of posts into time to reflect on things, life, love, loss, light, darkness, doubt, despair, faith, hope, Grace.  I knew it would feel great to be in here with you again, I was right. Sigh. Thank you💗

Kool-Aid Mustache and Bubble Pipe's

The idea of ending-up with a mustache while drinking Kool-Aid, appealed to me. It made me feel sporty, fun and it was acceptable for me to have a mustache. I enjoyed the interacting 

with a beverage, I also enjoyed the bubble pipes another interactive type toy of the 60s, along with candy cigarettes and gum cigars, wax lips and a very cool harmonica type waxy orange edible instrument. 

Of childhood attractions and treats, an all time fav has got to be; Popeye, he glorified spinach for me, I thought I would be big brave and strong if I ate spinach, but more than anything, his personal manifesto; I am what I am, caught my attention even as a child. The very idea inspires me still, to simply be me. So, in the name of being me and true to myself. I echo Popeye The (salty) Sailor Man, when I say: "I am what I am" Kool-Aid mustache, bubble pipe, big wax lips and all!!            

Or Is It Just Me

The world seems to be moving at warp speed, you get on with the trials and tribulations, the mundane and the magical moments, then one day you look-up and months and years have gone by, or is it just me. The cares and concerns, that took up so much of your life at one time are not even given more than a fleeting thought now, or is it just me. 

The challenges sometimes one after the other, once thought to be overwhelming and unsurmountable have been met with courage and the will to proceed accordingly and we feel satisfied knowing we did what it took to get something done, or is it just me. 

We can't get enough of some people sometimes all we want is to be alone nice and quiet in our own private space, or is it just me. Sometimes we crave the sound of melody, rhythm and a good story in a song, when  music is the only antidote and sometimes at the end of the day we cannot bear one note of a tune, it is time to refrain from listening to what we take so much comfort in at other times. It is simply time to take a break turn-off the music and tune-in to the spaciousness of silence, or is it just me.

Layers

Layers of life stack-up, spread-out and shape one's way. It happens in an instant and over a period of time with the subtlty of a wrecking ball or a whisper. Changes occur without warning and can leave one feeling better or battered and bruised. The laws of peaceful living easily disrupted by a layer of messy consequences or leave one feeling lifted, new and improved. It all depends on the type of layer life is dealing or has dealt. The layers of emotion, thoughts, feelings, forms of communication, natural, supernatural elements that are artificial or authentic, simple and complicated, hard not to take personally and every stunning to stinkin layer, are best handled with care, peace and love.

Layers of love can resemble a beautiful bright moon or amazing sunset spectacular and filled with every single glimmer of light and goodness that it illuminates. Layers of love can be dark and tear one's heart out left in the middle of nowhere. Love's layers abound, sometimes predictable or full of surprises, the duration and quality of it's very presence are ultimately left to it's own conclusions, mysteriously woven into life as miraculously as life itself.

Layers of sight, sound, smell and touch can be as transparent as air, shake you to the core with sorrow or leave you speechless from delight, humbled and in awe and in appreciation of the moment. The sight of something rare and wonderful as a beautiful butterfly floating along it's merry way, creates a layer of euphoria while the sight of someone suffering is heart wrenching and weighs heavy on your mind. The layers of sound like laughter while a loud abrupt noise prompts anger, confusion, annoyance at the very least. To hear the sound of a running stream, birds chirping, leaves rustling in the wind or a great melody just done decorate one's day with fundamental layers of life. To smell freshly roasted green chile or other favorite food being prepared, the familiar scent of a loved one, a flower and the sweetness after a rain are welcome fragrances that linger in your memory.

Wonder

To maintain the wonderful sense of wonder through the years, through the times when we do not feel much like wondering what, why, where and how unless those questions are a matter of life and death. Maybe we simply get complacent, bored, jaded or luke-warm about life the world at large and it's many wonderous people, places and things. To maintain that magical wonder of youth at any age seems to be the key to staying young at heart rather than developing a particular blindness, tone-deafness or disensitivy to the savory and sweetness,  surrounding us.

I wonder how people get along in life without faith in something more than what is seen on this earthly plane. I wonder why animals do not talk and maybe grateful they don't except with their eyes, hearts and souls. I wonder why things like how people everywhere, are not cared for with more equality and respect. I wonder how the earth and all of its inhabitants came into existence among the vastness of the universe. 
I wonder how gravity, astronomy, physics, science and art operates and does the amazing mind-expanding things each  does. 

Where, when, who started it all? My faith in the author and creator of life answers some questions with broad strokes and sometimes with detailed information. Still, I wonder about the intricate nature of things and the dynamics involved but I am satisfied and at peace with the understanding that some questions will remain unanswered and the mysteries and wonders of life will go on.